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2015-05-04. Dakota Johnson Braless Boobtastic At 50 Shades Of Grey Afterparty

These are whirlwind times for Dakota Johnson. 50 Shades of Grey is about to make her a leading lady star, even if the bulk of the critical world leaves her with less than kind remarks. I think most people realize itís the material. Though earnest attempts to make BDSM movies lie mostly now with antiquity, on the bottom racks of long since closed up Blockbuster racks. Dakota Johnson is making the most of her 50 minutes of new found fame. Showing off her chestal goodies at a premiere afterparty in London. You know itís a bit nippy this time of year in the London evening. So nippy went Dakota, showing off some serious skin because even at the Antarctic premiere of this kind of movie, youíd be expected to dangle some treats. She looked great. I wish her movie only does well. Thereís far more shameful craptastic out there. If women want to delve into this prurient bit of pudding, let them have their moment. Enjoy.

2015-05-03. Abigail Ratchford Nearly Spills Out Of Red Lingerie

Abigail Ratchford and her gigantic ta-tas posed in these delicious pictures in red lingerie. I find that not everyone can get away with red undies, but Abigail can and how. Abigail is maybe the hottest woman Iíve ever seen. No joke. We report on a lot of different kinds and sizes of chest puppies here on Egotastic. But Abigailís are among my top three favorites. I mean, look at them! The red silk stockings showed off her long gorgeous legs. I would love to have those bad boys wrapped around me. But possibly my favorite part of her outfit is the tiny red heart that functions as her panties. It BARELY covers up her lady parts. I imagine that that is a masterpiece of goodness under there. Iím going to take a little while to stare at these pics. Really study them and sear their image into my brain forever.

2015-05-02. Scarlett Johansson Busty In Lace Bustier For W Magazine

Oh, Scarlett Johansson, your powers to move men into stupid lost thoughts is quite unparalleled. Iím not sure it will ever fade. I know I never want it to. In this Oscars month, all the A-list celebrities are posing for their share of big time magazine pictorials, including this luscious bit of Scarlett in W magazine. Oh, many how she creates thousand upon millions of tingles up and down the central nervous system. Itís some kind of witchcraft. We should probably burn her at the stake, or, since this is 2015, just force her to watch me make smores at my place while she dances nekkid in my kitchen/living room. Just throwing that out there as a random alternate option. Scarlett, you make me absolutely crazy. Enjoy.

2015-05-01. Hayley Marie Coppin Secretary Submission Fantasy

Mr. Swift will see you now. Indeed. You can have your coquettish trembling assistant. Iíll take Hayley-Marie Coppin as my gal Friday, and every other day of the week. This sextastic stripteaser extraordinaire knows precisely how to provide my executive staff with the assistant it requires. Hayley-Marie really does lay on the luscious office fantasy-scape like no other. You know very well those clothes are not staying on particularly long when Ms. Coppin comes to work. Oh, that prevailing laws of nature and the labor department didnít prevent this dream from becoming a reality. I might actually show up to work more often, and on time, and less hungover. Everybody needs a good right hand woman. Enjoy.

2015-04-30. Coco Flashes Panties And Deep Cleavage Dining Out

I didnít do so well in most of my classes past the fourth grade or so. Physics, forget about it. But Iím pretty sure just from common sense I can tell you that the body Coco has built for herself is not going to properly fit into the dress she picked out for herself last night. Two objects can not occupy the same space at the same time, or something like that. While Cocoís enormous yams didnít come plummeting out of her top as I suspected they might, her panties peeked out from under her tight short dress and other of her curvy lady parts seemed to threaten to party in the spotlight just about the same. Iíll say this for Coco, sheís never boring. Iíve spoken with her before and sheís about the nicest, sweetest person youíve ever met. When women are even halfway polite to me, that says something about their character. But as far as grabbing dresses off the rack and thinking theyíd fit her perfectly, well, Coco might have a slightly different selection process than Ann Marie Bellaganza, the woman with the mole who used to chaperone the girls at our dances. She was not a fan of girls showing any skin or curves. She kept them under strict conservative lock and key. Until most of them got pregnant. Go figure how that happens. Enjoy.

2015-04-29. Beyonce Super Cleavage Battles The Demons Of The Yeezy Booty Debacle

Iíd be remiss in my duties if I didnít give a shoutout to Beyonce boobtastic, on display after that hideous Kanye West Fashion Week charade of shoes. The entire episode might have been one of the worst events in the history of the human race had it not been for Beyonce showing off her chesty goodness after leaving the show. Iík pretty sure she knows Kanyeís booties suck. But she wasnít going to waste the highly publicized event without showing off some of the skin that has helped to make Beyonce one of the premiere music acts in the world. When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. When it gives you overpriced suede booties by Yeezus, you turn it into the chance to remind 50 million men why they dream of you many a cold evening. The Sasha Fierce funbags are quite the kicker. Enjoy.

2015-04-28. Pop Star Nadeea Volianova Hand Bra

Pop princess Nadeea Volianova wants to be your post-Valentine Valentine in this mostly naked photo spread. Nadeea is using just her hands as a bra. Maybe some flowers too. She has a SPECTACULAR pair of funbags. I know that might seem like hyperbole, but itís totally not. I want to frame the pic of her licking a lollipop and put it over my bed so itís the last thing I see ever night before I go to sleep. That way I can dream about whatís behind the flowers and teddy bear. I bet itís amazeballs. This girl has a bright future ahead of her, especially if she keeps taking off her clothes. Thereís no key to success like showing off your yum yums.

2015-04-27. Mariam Bachir Oodles Of Barely Clothed Sextastica In Fhm Spain

If you happen to dig wicked hot Spanish-Arabic brunette film actresses who take almost all of their clothes off for magazines, well, today is one of your luckier days. TV and film thespianic Mariam Bachir agreed to appear in various stage of undress for FHM Spain, and we just had to share. Apparently, a ridiculously hot woman in her underwear or nekkid beneath a sheet is a pretty universal bit of visual wonderment for gentleman oglers. As Iíve always cited, sextastic women fantasies are the currency that binds the world. Mariam really didnít have to go and do a showy pictorial, but she is all about the love. And the lust. And proving that itís okay to be alluring and a dramatic actress. If youíve got it, flaunt it. Donít hate on your own beauty because you fear audiences may not take you seriously. We do. Mariam Bachir in her undies I take beyond seriously. I want to hoist a flag and salute. Consider that done. Enjoy.

2015-04-26. Busty Maitland Ward

When Maitland Ward told me she had shot some Valentineís photos just for us, well, I ran out and bought her flowers last minute as a thank you. Not so much bought as grabbed from my neighborís yard into a bouquet. You know, those online flower places are nuts expensive. Iím sentimental, but practical. While Maitland Ward and her desperately divine cleavage are more on the practical side. As in, practically killing me with their pillowy wonders. Maitland coming out of her shell and showing off her soft ginger goodness was truly a revelation in 2014. This year ought to be even better. When she thinks of us personally, I get a special little twinge in my special little twinge area. Itís just nice to know somebodyís thinking of you on Valentineís Day, especially somebody with the chest of a goddess. Hearts and kisses, Maitland. Iím not good at relationships, but I take abuse well. Youíll discover itís very similar. Enjoy.

2015-04-25. Kennedy Summers Busting Out Of Black Lacy Lingerie For Playboy Plus

I just couldnít wait very long this time. After seeing Kennedy Summers in her bikini just minutes ago, I had to share another glorious set of the PMOY in various stages of undress for Playboy magazine. This medical student slash beyond smoking hot blonde just toys with my mind something awful. Thanks to our friends at PlayboyPlus, we have another sweltering hot peek at Kennedy quite nekkid all over. Some guys are into golf, some into cars, Iím into Kennedy Summers, if only that werenít just figurative.

2015-03-01. Kanye Wests Former Girlfriend Amber Rose Makes A Sex Tape

2015-01-08. Alice Goodwin Poses Topless For Interviu Spain

Iím not sure what raven haired brunette beauty Alice Goodwin is doing all Spanish like in Interviu magazine, but Iíve learned in life not to look a gift horse in the mouth. Though it is perfectly acceptable to look a wicked hot glamour model in the funbags. Especially if their big muscular boyfriends arenít around. Otherwise, I recommend chest leering with caution. Alice is featured in the current edition of Interviu magazine where she is quoted as saying a whole bunch of things just outside my mediocre to poor level of Spanish, but thankfully includes a bevy of photos of Alice flashing her stellar yams, making this periodical a must peruse edition. I used to wake up at night with a feverish sweat dreaming about Alice slapping me with her long dark locks. Now, Iíve trained myself not to wake up because what happens next is even better. I donít dream kiss and tell. Enjoy.

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